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Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Obama Signs Stimulus – Crisis Averted

The Department of Redundancy Department at ObamaNation reports the following breaking news…again: The stimulus bill is not stimulating at all.

This is not a deja vu moment, it is just Obama still selling low expectations at a high cost.

Just recently we got yet another doomsday prophecy from ObamaNation, as referenced in this report from the NY Times:

"As President Obama prepares to sign the $787 billion stimulus bill, administration officials sought to temper expectations, warning that the economy has not yet reached bottom and that increased economic activity as a result of the legislation would "take time to show up in the statistics.""

This is sounding suspiciously like the $700B the Fed needed to "restore the financial markets." Amazingly, all this money has not restored the financial markets, or at least my portfolio hasn't received the memo.

But we were told during the election that under Bush things just couldn't get any worse? Pray tell, did Obama lie?

Well the economy has indeed gotten worse, but Obama, our leader, purveyor of "hope and change", elected to inspire us, instead reminds us:  "I inherited this mess". Oh and would somebody bring me my brown underwear.

Obama's election was to be the cure for all our ills, or that is how the mainstream media sold it. Yet we find things "getting worse, before it gets better", as Biden prophesized much to the disdain of the "Immaculate Perception".

So to save us, Obama plans his West Coast swing where he will sign Obamulus von Porkulus into law, while simultaneously asking us to lower our expectations. Apparently stimulus is all fizzle with no sizzle fa shizzle.

You would have to be a complete moron to believe that the government can create any jobs, much less 4M new jobs.

Speaking of complete morons, what has Obama been up to since gaining approval of Obamulus von Porkulus last week?

First he went on a campaign tour pushing "turdburgers" to the American public who are obviously and overwhelmingly appalled at size and scope of "the package". [Excuse me while I whip this out!]

Next he spent a romantic weekend with 'his babies' momma', where I would guess the subject of "the package" was discussed, at length. Have fun with the sexual innuendo.

Finally, we were informed by the mainstream media that instead of taking a day off, Obama worked on president's day.  Diligent president he is, unrelenting in his pursuit of…trickeration?

With something so important you would think that one day could make a dramatic difference, yet Obama had the legislation on his desk last week, ready for signature. Why didn't he "git 'er done"?

Here's the wrap:

He didn't "git 'er done", because Obamulus von Porkulus was never about the economy!

Even Obama's own economic advisors won't take ownership of this turd. As a friend of mine wrote to me recently, "…looking for the good side of this so-called stimulus bill, is like saying you will pick up a turd from the clean end".

Inside of Obamulus von Porkulus are buried little Liberal jewels like health care reform, gun control, and other morsels of the Liberal agenda, particularly things that will reassure their easy election...in perpetuity!

And with 1000+ pages that were not read by anybody before signature, we are about to find out what core American values have been stabbed through the heart.

It's official…crisis averted.

That's my rant!

© 2009 Kevin Jackson – The Black Sphere All Rights Reserved


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45 comments:

Anonymous said...

Landthatilove

FTA:
This is sounding suspiciously like the $700B the Fed needed to "restore the financial markets." Amazingly, all this money has not restored the financial markets, or at least my portfolio hasn't received the memo.

But we were told during the election that under Bush things just couldn't get any worse? Pray tell, did Obama lie?

A politician lie? Perish the thought!

Anonymous said...

GlobalRoamer

Every day Barack Obama announces that the economy is closer and closer to the brink. Apparently he has spent too much time at a practice called brinking – or as the kids call it “brinking off”. These constant warnings about Armageddon by Obama are now the official lingo of the Democrat Party called - “Doomspeak”.

Barack knows “now is the time” but apparently he doesn’t know for what. At the moment he has put the nation in the eye of the Katrina economy.

Diane said...

ROTFLMBO!!!!! Thank you! Oh my goodness, reading that felt so good! LOL Hmmm....that almost sounded bad didn't it? LOL I did not mean it that way. (blushing) You said what so many of us would like to say! Great rant!

The Black Sphere said...

Diane, I'm glad you got a kick out of this blog. Personally I think this is a pretty good one, but I am biased. Now go have that cigarette! :-)

Anonymous said...

chupavacas

"Crisis Averted" -Ha!

Ron B said...

Crisis Averted....or Hurry Up and Wait! Get it done. Get it Done. get it done is all we heard for weeks. Then Kruella had to get it done so that she could go see the Pope. She needed his blessings. Big "O" spends his weekend with his sweetheart but so did I.

Then because there were no cameras rolling on Monday or his pen was broke or Bush took all the pens (he inherited this mess) or probably because 1000+ pages had not come back from FedEX-Kinko's yet he could not sign it. Hurry up and wait.....


Now for you young man "...while I whip it out!" That was good. "Picking up the turd from the clean end." That was better.

I don't feel stimulated maybe violated. How can anyone intelligently say that this is a good bill if you never had a chance to read it in its entirity.

Big "O" has scared everyone into believing that the Boogey Man is coming, so hurry up to lower your expectations.....check me out on fear and the boogey man.

"Sir" RonB

Illinois Knows said...

Oh but Kevin it WILL create/save jobs. It is winter, un-employment always goes up in the winter, especially in construction. Spring is just around the corner, things are warming up, snow is melting. Of course construction is going to start back up. I-90 in NO. IL. has signs up stating that the construction to widen it (that has been going on for 2 yrs) will be RE-starting this week. Hummm, who do you think is going to take credit for those workers going back to work on infrastructure? Timing is everything.
Lilly

The Black Sphere said...

@Lilly - Thank God for Obama or those spring jobs would not occur!

The Black Sphere said...

Sir Ron! Now don't go using logic in dealing with Liberals. Just because all those "Dimocratic leaders" have not read the document, doesn't mean that they don't know about it's "feel good" potential for the American taxpayers...oh and let's not forget the non-taxpayers.

Anonymous said...

Tommy Zerse February 17

Interestingly, I recieved a call from a VA group trying to raise money for Iraq war veterans today. The money I wend will be used to help purchas crutches, canes, wheelchairs etc. Assuming that this call was on the level, I told this guy that they would do better to call Obama and tell them that they were seeking donations for auto and banking industry veterans. At least that will save me from having to send money to both places!!

drjim said...

Interesting that soon after The One signed his porkulus bill, the Dow DROPPED 300 points. Reeeal stimulatin' for the masses, aint it?
Jim

The Black Sphere said...

The Dow is not a kool-aid drinker!

Anonymous said...

Landthatilove

You mean this isn't "hope"?

Annie said...

Personally, I can't wait until the federal government figures out that my state has a decent financial reserve and they decide to audit the state and "share the wealth around" to CA, KS, and the like. In fact, that's probably in fine print on the bottom of page 349 or something.

Anonymous said...

lizbett

Ahahahahahahahahahahaha
Crisis Averted
Everyone should just become a liberal now since the government agenda for any & all liberal programs will be funded no questions and anyone that has ever donated to the election of any liberal for any reason shall be paid back.
Back to the welfare ways of old...no accountability
Healthcare reform with no debate
Best scam ever perpetrated on the "We the People".

Anonymous said...

Stallionism

Obama has saved the day. I'm going to spend all my savings to boost the economy.

Julie said...

OMG, I love this ""…looking for the good side of this so-called stimulus bill, is like saying you will pick up a turd from the clean end". Perfect way to look at it. Thanks for the laugh on a otherwise gloomy day.

BTW, the book cover looks great, when is coming out?

The Black Sphere said...

Julie, glad to make you laugh! That is the "working book cover" and a placeholder only. Book should be done in about 4 weeks, 6 at the most! Exciting for me!

The Black Sphere said...

@Annie - If you state pays its bill, then Obama's gonna "pimp tax" you. If your state doesn't pay its bill, then it gets a reward. Such is the new way!

clyde said...

i'm reminded of a scene from a disney movie - bambi, i think. the innocent deer is surrounded by singing blue jays. was there an owl swaying in the background? everyone is happy, not a care in the world ... it's all good.

that is until they read the paper and see hamas still shelling, iran getting missiles from russia, syria giving hizbullah anti-air systems ... that stuff's not good - but the rest is oh so wonderful!

The Black Sphere said...

Clyde, you think like me, my friend. I like that. Yes, while the knuckleheads are celebrating Obamulus von Porkulus, the world is preparing to kick us in the "nads".

Anonymous said...

Stallionism

I was watching his little speech on television. I burst out laughing when he said there was no pork. It was also important to note that he said it had support of the Republicans.

Anonymous said...

rjwusa

Whew! Just in time! Now, if the stock market will just start going UP, and those pesky letters I keep getting from my cerdit card companies that inform me that my interest rates are going up while my available credit is reduced will stop coming. And if only the value of my house will go back up, and perhaps our high unemployment rate in this state will drop....Tomorrow, it will all 'change'! Birds will start singing, dogs and cats will begin sleeping together and the sun will shine through a replenished ozone layer! Tomorrow, a five pound block of goverment cheese will be in my mailbox, and my taxes will plunge dramtically! Oh JOY! Obama has saved us! HAIL OBAMA! HAIL OBAMA! HEIL OBAMA! HEIL OBAMA! HEIL OBAMA!

Digital Publius said...

Great rant Kevin, the Alex Ross super "O" painting pissed me off even more, I had never seen that. I googled Alex Ross Obama painting to make sure he was in fact the artist, and I found a bunch of other liberal promoting crap that he had painted. I had no idea he was such a pinko, I was a fan of his.

Boy on a bike said...

This is the only effective way a government has ever created millions of jobs (and it is a beautiful chart):

http://www.historyshots.com/USArmy/index.cfm

Somehow, I think Obama will regard this as a "failed theory of the past".

The Black Sphere said...

Digital - Thanks for the comment. I wasn't familiar with this artist, but glad he is outed!

Chip Head said...

Yesterday my Democrat freshman congressman said he backed the bill because it would mean 7,000 jobs for Orlando. Since the 8th District covers parts of the greater Orlando area, and just not the city, I did the math. The cost to the taxpayers in the Orlando area for each of the 7,000 jobs is approximately $777,100.

That number is based upon the greater Orlando area population of 2,100,000 and a national population of 303,800,000 (both rounded 2008 numbers). My assumption is Orlando will pay taxes (to later repay the cost of the bill) in proportion to its portion of the U.S. population.

madmath1 said...

My wife and I just watched a documentary about the national debt and what its consequence will mean if it goes unchecked. The big complaint was how bush raised it 3.3 trillion over 8 years and Obama has nearly done half that with the bailouts and now this piggy of a bill. That means he's nearly raised it half of Bush's presidentcy in just under one month and he's not done yet folks. Wait til he gets his nationalized health care into the pen with the other piggies. We're in so much serious touble and this man hasn't been in office for a month. At least many liberal voters are wanting their votes back, but too little (or should I say too much) too late.

I will note that in the documentary their was a comment about how we're the worse savers on the planet. You think Obama voters are the most or least worse of that group. I know I shouldn't ask questions we all know the answers to, but it does demonstrate the point. Given how they're all givemee givemee givemee, the fact that we're having so many on the dole while so few are contribruting, relatively as a whole, wasn't mentioned and would had put a light on how bad politically and fiscally we really are.

Pass the pineapple and BBQ sauce, we're about to have the world's biggest BBQ when this pork policy goes up in fiscal flames.

Anonymous said...

Janinco

Heil Obama...

Anonymous said...

Landthatilove

Obama supporters. Like Zombies, but with no interest in brains, whatsoever.

Anonymous said...

DucoNihilum

And so begins the fall of Rom.... I mean America.

Well, it was a good country while it lasted.

This is going to be the biggest breach of the federal government since the new deal.

DontBlameMeIWantedPalin said...

That's right, Kevin, the stock market is no cool-aid drinker. It's been on to this guy from the beginning:

http://img4.imageshack.us/img4/7479/90734588qt1.jpg

Market has sunk any time Obama has taken a big step closer to the presidency, and to passing this "stimulus."

The stock market's drop over the past year begins in earnest around late August 2008 when the Clinton/Obama nomination saga ends and Obama is nominated.

It bounces back a bit as McCain's prospects improves, and then it plunges like a -- well, like a turd from a bird -- as President Obama becomes inevitable.

The plunge accelerates as the full scope of Obama's leftist plans become evident to investors and everybody else.

Team Obama forgets that the real election never ends: the daily, hourly, second-to-second verdict of the financial markets. Human capital and financial capital votes every day...with its feet and its clicks. The U.S. is no longer the only game in town. Gold is soaring.

Financial markets are sending a huge vote of no confidence. There going to impose a harsh limit to how much more of this waste and incompetence can go on.

Just wait until the dollar collapses and interest rates spike....but then, it'll be Bush's fault, right?

Anonymous said...

Navigator7

Invest in shovels!

Anonymous said...

rjwusa

That'll put a lot of illegals out of work. Is that ethical?

The Black Sphere said...

It just dawned on me that nobody has mentioned the "Department of Redundancy Department".

Anonymous said...

Kevin, I continue to be startled by all the things you and I have in common.

"the Dept. of Redundancy Dept." is a line I've been using since high school. I didn't invent it, but hey, I know a good joke when I steal one. :-)

And here you are, not just using it but expecting it to draw giggles. just like I do when I use it. :-)

talk to you tomorrow amigo

Big Dave

The Black Sphere said...

I'm vindicated! Thanks Big Dave, the best radio producer in the soon-to-be no longer free world!

drjim said...

yep, straight out of "The Firesign Theater"!
What could be more fitting, with a real-live BOZO in office!

Ben said...

Great article Kevin, donated to the "Adoption Exchange" today. Thank you for letting us help out these kids and yourself. As for the UAW, these slouches have been the benefactors of our free market economy for so long they figured out a way to manipulate the rules. They were well paid when we needed them, but now that our self-correcting market tells them to go away, they rig the system. These bailouts are a joke!

Syed Rizvi said...

I totally love this blog.
Kevin you are the real American
Keep it up
Read this blog
koolaidtime.blogspot.com

The Black Sphere said...

Syed - Thanks for visiting!

Anonymous said...

Stephanie Dunn February 18

And today he is solving the housing crisis that he and ACORN caused. But, he is the savior

The Black Sphere said...

@Stephanie - ...from a tiny ACORN, and "oaf" shall grow!

Anonymous said...

Barackalypse

Someone should tell that to the market, it fell after he signed that Federal spendfest.
"Investors shrug off stimulus bill; Dow falls 298"

The Black Sphere said...

@Barackalypse - The Dow recognizes a fraud, even if the kool-aiders don't!